Keaton's First Christmas

Keaton's first Christmas came and went like a flash. All this time preparing and it's over so fast! Keaton had a great first Christmas and added such enjoyment to the traditional festivities with our families. Christmas Eve church service...not so great. We got all dressed up, drove to church, sat down and 2 minutes later Keaton was SCREAMING! I immediately took him out and tried to calm him down....yeah, that was not happening. We figured out that it was when the congregation clapped after a performance that scared the crap out of him that he started screaming. Needless to say we only lasted a couple minutes and had to go home. My poor boy was so scared and would not stop screaming, the tears were rolling.

Christmas day, however, went very well. He napped well and enjoyed the whole day. Between my parents, my brother, and my grandma...he will be well dressed for the year and entertained for hours. I can't believe it is all over but I'm very excited for the new year and to watch my little boy grow. : )

Bath Time Fun!

Keaton absolutely loves getting a bath. We use this little squirt bottle that I got from the hospital to spray on him and he thinks it is hilarious. I can get him laughing hysterically, it is so cute! His feet are kicking constantly because he loves to splash....I can't wait until he can sit up and play with toys in the tub.

Watch out dads...

5 Months

5 months already?!?!? I feel like I just did his 4 month post. Every month he changes so much! Keaton is developing quite the personality...loves to smile and "talk" to everyone and anyone. My little man is not so little any more. He is now doing the following:

- Grabbing his feet every chance he can get

- Eating cereal every morning (barley, oatmeal or rice) and doing awesome with eating off a spoon

- Rolling over constantly (although he seems to forget how to roll from belly to back and gets stuck)

- Moved up to size 3 diapers and size 6-9 months clothes

- Holding his bottle (with minimal assistance)

Some things that he is doing that is not so fun....

- Now that he wants to roll over on his belly all the time he is starting to do this at night. Once he gets to his belly he doesn't want to be there and since he seems to forget how to roll back he wakes up SCREAMING! I try to run over and roll him back over before he gets too worked up but it never works. He is screaming his head off and won't stop. All the shhhhing and patting (without picking him up) does squat!!!! You have to pick him up to calm down. He is waking up screaming now (because he is on his belly) around 9:30pm, 12:30am and 4:00am EVERY.SINGLE.NIGHT and taking about 20-30 minutes to calm him down each time! UGH! I miss my baby that only wakes up once a night (not screaming either), even sleeping through the night, to eat quick and goes right back down. I sure hope this passes soon!!!! It may be some teething issues too, I'm not sure.

- Naps!!! UGH...these are frustrating and I'm at my wits end with them. I am happy to have him on a consistent nap schedule (8am, 12:30pm (small cat nap) and 3:30pm) but he will not do the crib or any other place other than in my arms! This means I spend about 4 hours a day up in the nursery sitting in the rocking chair holding him to sleep. Every day around his nap times, I take him upstairs, turn off the lights, turn on his lullaby music and "dance" around the room with him until he gets drowsy and sometimes attempt the crib but most of the time I just sit down with him and let him nap to avoid Screamfest 2009. He knows the routine though...as soon as I walk into the room and put that music on he starts calming down to sleep (with little fussing). I guess I have some progress there but I plan to work on the next phase after Christmas to not stress myself out too much. So I will continue to sit in his room with him for about 4 hours of my day until I work on the next phase. It does force me to relax and maybe get a couple minutes of shut eye. I play games on my blackberry if I'm not relaxing. Oh, the things us mothers do for our children!!!! If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know!

Other than that...he is a very happy boy and he makes us smile every day!!! Below are some pics of my little guy. Enjoy!

Stress and Worry

I can't remember a day when I felt completely relaxed and stress-free...those days remain back in my childhood. I am a constant worry wort that can NEVER shut my brain off even for one second. I spend countless hours thinking about anything and everything that I have this constant knot in my stomach. So you can only imagine how much WORSE it has gotten for me after having a baby.

I can't stop researching and asking people about my parenting skills wondering if I am doing something wrong. I spend hours after Keaton goes to bed reading and looking up information about sleeping through the night, napping in crib, eating solids, milestones, you name it! I can't seem to get this thought out of my head that I am doing something wrong with raising my son. People can tell me a hundred times that I am doing a great job but I have a hard time believing it. I hate that I am this way because I really think I am missing out on the enjoyment of being a parent. Don't get me wrong...I love being a parent and watching Keaton grow everyday is such a blessing but I struggle everyday to relax! I am so worried that I ask myself things like...Will Keaton stay on his schedule today?, Will he take 2 naps today? Will he nap longer than 1 hour? Will he take all his bottle? What if he cries when we go to the mall?. I stress when I have to leave him with Erik for a couple hours so I end up texting him the whole time to check up. I trust that Erik can take care of things, I just worry that something will happen or Erik won't do something quite the way I like to do things, etc. Why do I feel this way all the time?

Let's take Keaton's napping issues...I worry myself to death about how I am "training" him to nap. I sit and read all these different sleep training techniques that my head is about to explode. Every "expert" has a different opinion and it makes a new mom go crazy with confusion. I can't stop worrying about this!!!! I'm trying so hard to be happy that I am being consistent with my abilities and that one day everything will just fall into place. This napping issue is just ONE thing that I stress about on a daily basis.

I knew that this parenting adventure was not going to be easy but wow, I am beyond stressed! I just want everything I do to be perfect for my son and I am sacrificing my happiness for him. I know that this is not healthy but I can't seem to lose this knot in my stomach and this constant nervous feeling that I have. Hopefully someday soon I will learn to relax and believe in my abilities but this is something I have struggled with my entire adult life.

My Little Reindeer!